“I’m Yours (Use Me Any You Wanna)” – Ike and Tina Turner

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nXrJLL4wUts

Yes, this song is more than a little creepy these days given what we all now know of Ike & Tina’s personal relationship. But sweet lord, is this a great song! If anyone wants to say the best Ike & Tina song is “Proud Mary,” “Nutbush City Limits,” “A Fool in Love,” or “River Deep Mountain High,” I would not give that person any crap. But this, in my opinion, was their greatest track.

“Temptation” – Moby

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Another case of “it’s singer, not the song.” The original version of “Temptation” by New Order is really good, but what’s hard to discern behind the upbeat techno rhythms is a rather despairing song about the helplessness of addiction. I believe Moby sensed this and in his version, slowed the song down considerably, condensed the lyrics, and took the pathos of the song VERY seriously. The subdued nature of the vocals by Laura Dawn only magnifies the horror of the lyrics. Reminds me a lot of Lou Reed’s “Perfect Day.”

“A Good Heart” – Maria McKee

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Maria McKee was lead singer of an 80s band called Lone Justice that everyone expected to break big and never quite did, despite a couple of minor hits. She had a few hits in Europe, but her greatest success was writing “A Good Heart” for former Undertones lead singer Feargal Sharkey. Sharkey’s version was a #1 smash in England in 1985. McKee would cover the song occasionally in concert, but didn’t record her own version until 2007. It was a very smart move. McKee has always had a great voice, but it’s gotten way better as she’s gotten older. As a result, this song has way more resonance. (If you buy me a beer, I’ll recite the above in a Casey Kasem voice with lots of dramatic pauses).

“Summer of ’89” – Butch Walker and the Black Widows

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Nostalgia can be a tricky thing. On the surface, “Summer of ’89″ seems like a typical fist-pumping nostalgia rock anthem like “Glory Days” or (ahem) “Summer of ’69.” But then the lyrics get darker and the fates of his friends get grimmer (in a non-funny and non-ironic way). And then about three minutes in, the song takes a kind of odd Violent Femmes style turn which ends with Walker desperately screaming “When do I become?!?” before segueing back into the fist pumping chorus. On the one hand, you can enjoy the perverse twists and turns of this deceptively simple and brilliantly written song. Or you can ignore what I say and just pump your fist in the air like you just don’t care (which the song is good for as well). Enjoy this before Budweiser puts it in a commercial.

On a personal note, there’s nothing in this song that even remotely resembles my summer of ’89, unless I missed a lyric about working at Pizza Hut or mowing lawns.

“Ain’t it Fun” – Guns N’ Roses

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEArS2gtYGQ

Guns N’ Roses’ killer cover of Peter Laughner’s / The Dead Boys’ sad, nihilistic classic “Ain’t It Fun.”  Recorded for their punk cover album “The Spaghetti Incident,” this is the best version of this song I’ve heard.  There have been some good versions (Dead Boys, Rollins Band) over the years, but the Guns N’ Roses version is probably the best, in my opinion.  It’s probably no coincidence that this ended up on their greatest hits CD.  If any song sums up composer Laughner’s life, it’s this song.  If you have any interest in what you’ve just read, please read Lester Bangs’ legendary obituary of Laughner “Peter Laughner is Dead” for context (located in the Bangs’ compilation “Psychotic Reactions and Carburetor Dung”).

“Final Solution” – Pere Ubu

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The greatest song to emerge from the Cleveland underground from the mid-late 1970s.  I love how this song rides its sinister, minimalistic groove, gradually adding instruments, and then exploding at the end with a magnificent guitar solo by the late Peter Laughner.  Arguably, Laughner’s finest moment on record, though it’s well worth it to check out the material he recorded with Rocket from the Tombs and his posthumous solo compilation “Take the Guitar Player for a Ride.”

“Beyond the Valley of the Dolls” (1970) director Russ Meyer, writer Roger Ebert

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With the exception of Tom Green’s “Freddy Got Fingered,” this is probably the wildest, weirdest film ever released by 20th Century Fox (or any studio, for that matter).  The studio heads at Fox at the time (Richard Zanuck and David Brown) were so desperate to look hip and make money in the late 1960s, they hired sexploitation legend Russ Meyer to direct a pseudo-sequel to their trashy 1967 blockbuster “Valley of the Dolls.”  Meyer hired film critic Roger Ebert (yes, THAT Roger Ebert), the only mainstream critic who admitted to appreciating Meyer at the time, to write the screenplay.  What resulted was a masterpiece!  A twisted, f–ked-up, surreal, insane, X-rated masterpiece, but a masterpiece nonetheless.  Along with “Midnight Cowboy,” “A Clockwork Orange,” and “Last Tango in Paris,” “Beyond” was one of the few major studio X-rated films to be a box-office hit (a $50 million box-office hit, when inflation is taken into account).

This is one of those films where it’s hard to say whether it was intentionally campy, whether it was just so terrible that it’s funny, or something on the level of the meta-comedy of an Andy Kaufman or Sacha Baron Cohen.  As Ebert himself said about the tone of this film: “Meyer directed his actors with a poker face, solemnly, discussing the motivations behind each scene. Some of the actors asked me whether their dialogue wasn’t supposed to be humorous, but Meyer discussed it so seriously with them that they hesitated to risk offending him by voicing such a suggestion. The result is that ‘BVD’ has a curious tone all of its own. There have been movies in which the actors played straight knowing they were in satires, and movies which were unintentionally funny because they were so bad or camp. But the tone of ‘BVD’ comes from actors directed at right angles to the material. ‘If the actors perform as if they know they have funny lines, it won’t work,’ Meyer said, and he was right.

The attached clip is a pivotal scene, where the sinister Phil Spector-like music impresario named Ronnie “Z-Man” Barzell reveals his true nature to gigolo Lance Rock (gotta love those character names).  Lance is less than sensitive in his remarks to Z-Man and pays the price.  This scene teaches an important lesson: if you’ve been tied up by some maniac wielding a sword, and said maniac decides to disrobe, the smart move is to be complimentary on the maniac’s equipment.  To be fair, though, never having been in that position, I’m only guessing as to what the right move would be.  Apparently, when Ebert revealed to Meyer during the script stage that he was making Z-Man a woman, Meyer took it in stride, saying “You can never have too many women in a picture.”

Needless to say, due to the graphic violence and simulated nudity (you’ll know what I mean when you see the clip), not safe for work or little ones.